Freaky Friday

OK, after reading their newest post, I’ve been inspired by my friends over at Scootadoot to share with you all of the things that are *not* running-related and rattling around inside this brain of mine.So here we go!

First, my car was hit by a police officer late Tuesday night, as the cop was chasing after some punks kid in front of our house. After being super accommodating on the scene (“No really, officer, it’s totally fine! You were just doing your job! Just tell me what to do and we’ll make it all better!”), I learned the next day from my insurance agent that the State of NJ gives government vehicles this thing called “immunity”. Long story short: either I find a friend who can fix it for cheap/free, or I go through my own insurance, pay $544 to cover the repairs myself, and my insurance rates will go up too, since they can’t file a claim against the police.

Had I known this while the officers were in my living room, I would have been a lot less accommodating.

On the plus side: it could have been a lot worse! The car is still driveable in the meantime! Me and my husband are fine! But all because some idiot kids decided to stir the pot with some cops in front of my parked car, I now have to spend hours of my life and my own money putting things back to normal. So I’ve left a few unreturned messages with the Sergeant, I’m drafting an email right now, and now I’ll have to take time out of my weekend to go to the station and sort things out. It will all be resolved in time, I’m sure. Soon it’ll be just a little blip on the radar of my life. But it’s an extremely frustrating process to have to go through!

OK, enough with the negativity. I didn’t mean to rain on your parade. There are plenty of great things about this moment we’re living right now! Let’s talk about those.

1. These shoes:

CaptureThese shoes, these shoes, MY GOD THESE SHOES.

PS I’m a size 39 if you want to buy these for me and make me feel better about my car situation.

In my headier, more carefree days (read: college), I used to be quite a shoe whore. The more expensive, ridiculous, spike-heeled, pointy-toed the better. I loved it! But once I really grasped the value of the dollar and started paying my own rent – and realized I was committing joint-i-cide by stiletto – my footwear choices were based solely on cost, practicality and comfort first, with style and outlandishness coming in a distant 4th and 5th.

And then I spotted these on Scootadoot’s post. Thanks a lot, guys. My shoe-lust is back in a BIG way, and I cannot stop drooling! JK thank you for turning me onto Mod Cloth, I’m officially obsessed and loving it 🙂

2. Speaking of obsessed:

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I give you: Fifth Avenue.

I’ve never been a huge fan of painting my nails: they chip pretty much the second I put the bottle away. But I spotted this color on the nails of a fellow passenger the last time I flew somewhere for work, and I vowed to have my nails look as chic and put-together as hers forever and ever amen.

Fast forward to a month ago when I finally bought the stuff, and I’m loving it. It’s the perfect classic pop of color, but just different enough from the standard red nail to catch the eye. You probably can’t see on the computer monitor, but it’s not just red, it’s got some orange to it, for a more poppy-like brightness that I just love.

2. Valentine’s Day is tomorrow!

giphyEveryone all together now: yaaaay!

AKA what I like to call “Treat Yoself Day”, I look forward to Valentine’s Day every year. Ever since I was little, my mom and dad and i would give each other little gifts and candy and extra hugs and wow do I realize how cheesy that sounds when I type it out. But either way, it’s true: v-day is awesome! Even if you’re not coupled up with someone at the moment, take tomorrow to really appreciate and celebrate yourself. Get a massage. Get a pedicure. Buy yourself a fancy-ass pastry from the bakery you always drool over when you pass by. Unapologetically watch that movie that gives you all the feels. Whatever you do, be sure to DO YOU and love every minute of it. You earned it!

3. It’s Friday.

Enough said.

And in running news, I’m really not looking forward to 9 miles on the treadmill tomorrow (or Sunday), but I have to do what I have to do so I’m playing some mind games already with myself: “You get to spend two hours in a climate controlled gym and watch any movie you want! With a bathroom right there, and no ice to slip on! YAY!”

Yeah, I’ll let you know how that goes.

And that’s about it for me! How about you? Are you happy it’s Friday? How do you feel about nail polish? And most importantly: how do you plan on treating yourself tomorrow? Tell me everything!

The Lazy Runner Girl’s Guide to Hair

For as long as I’ve had hair, I’ve struggled with what to do with it, because it’s always been greasy. I’d wash and “style” each morning, only to throw it up in a ponytail by the end of the day because it got too dirty and flat. I was SO envious of girls who claimed a simple spritz of dry shampoo and blast with the hairdryer gave them the perfect “second day hair”. Then I took up running and it all went downhill. After my morning wash and “style” and the evening’s run, I’d have to wash my hair again – ouch!

But we live in a world where we’re told to exercise daily but only wash our hair every other day. How does that make sense??

It all came to a head back in 2013, when my knee surgery meant that I couldn’t shower for 3-4 days after the procedure – no hair washing either. And I learned something amazing: my tresses were like some captive animal, rebelling against the angry onslaught of blow dryer and shampoo by overproducing oil and grease. Because when it was left alone for 72+ hours, my hair went from greasy, to super greasy, to “Hey, this isn’t so bad”! And when I finally showered on day 4 (PS: best. shower. EVER.), I let it do its thing again for another 2 days, and wouldn’t you know it, it was like my hair’s reset button had been hit. I could let my hair go for a day – or even 2! – before needing to start all over again. My hair had returned to its natural state!

This is all to say that, when it comes to hair issues, I’ve been around the block. Once I really got back into running after my surgery, I had to learn how to treat my hair kindly both before, during, and after a run so that it stayed happy enough to go without washing every 24 hours. I had to experiment with different headbands, clips, and styles to tame my mane on the road, and tried about a dozen dry shampoos before finally finding a brand that works for me. So now I’m here to share all of those little tips and tricks that allow me to say that I am officially a recovered hair-washing addict – because I know I can’t be alone here!

1. Products

This has become my absolute go-to. I use it every other day (and then some), and have probably used 4 cans in the past year.

P0252_packshotSeriously, if they stop making this, I’m just going to shave my head and wear a wig.

It instantly dries up any grease and lifts my hair up just a tiny bit, and it’s impossible to use too much of it. The number one selling point for me though, is that it doesn’t make it stiff or gritty like some other dry shampoos I’ve tried. Plus it smells delicious and it’s only like $4 a can at Target. I buy two every time I see them!

If I’m feeling especially lazy – or my hair has been a little overworked – I skip the drying process, throw a tiny bit of this goop in my hair (skipping the roots), chuck it all in a braid and call it a day. Let it air-dry, finger-brush and floof as desired, and voila: deliberately messy hair don’t care.

How about you: are there any products you can’t live without? Share!

2. Styles

  • Daily/Non-Running Styling

My hair hasn’t ever had a style. If I were to hop on the therapist’s couch, I’d have to say it stems from my very first hair fail at the age of 7, when my mom decided to give in to her crazy daughter and get her a PERM. At age SEVEN.

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My heart hurts just looking at it.

The perm finally grew out when I got to middle school (praise Jesus), where I continued to make even more questionable – but less permanent – choices like Manic Panic, Kool-Aid hair dye, and the like. Cut to my high school and college years, where I basically went for a longer version of The Rachel, in either a pony or down, depending on my mood.

A few years ago I learned how to “curl” my hair with a flat iron (which also taught me that, in moderation, hair spray is my friend), and wouldn’t you know it, I had a new “going out” hair style!

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And then along came this magical hair tutorial:

No-heat styling? What is this madness? I suddenly don’t even need to blow dry the ever-loving hell out of my hair! I’m hooked, and have worn my hair like this at least once a week since I discovered this video. I’m also going majorly crazy over all the other easy-to-follow tutorials they’ve got there.

Do you have any go-to styles that you want to share?

  • Running Styling

Similar to my every day hair, my running styles are basically non-existent. I stick with a headband and pony and it seems to work.

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But sometimes, I like to get a little creative – especially on race day. That’s when the braids come out:

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I’ll admit: my race-day hair style is dependent more on the cute factor than any weather forecast or logistical need. For example: the hat/braid combo you see up there is because I ran my last race in a pair of cheap ray-ban knock offs and looked like a fool in all my race photos. So since I hadn’t found the right running sunnies by race day, I opted for a hat. Not my best sartorial choice, but whatevs.

But aside from the pony and the braids, I’m hopelessly out of ideas. Due to an abundance of layers and lack of practice on any siblings for the first 15+ years of my life, I cannot french braid my hair to save my life so that’s out. And I am SO envious of girls who have those fantastically swishy ponytails that trail forever and never get tangled. You are all witches, and I wish I were you.

How do you wear your hair for a run vs. race-day?

3. Tips and Tricks

  • My number one tip to save post-workout hair from needing a shower is this: as soon as you’re done working out, get ye to the nearest hair dryer, STAT! Take out your hair tie/ponytail/headband/clips, and blast your hair with cool air to dry all the sweat from your scalp. Then once it’s dry, do the dry shampoo thing.
  • Try to stay away from heat styling as much as possible. I know it’s pretty unavoidable, especially in the winter months when going out with a wet head of hair is an old wives’ worst nightmare/recipe for your death by cold, but all that extreme heat can’t be good for your locks day in and day out.
  • If you’re desperately greasy like I was (and you’ve got a full 2-3 days to swing it), try doing the hair reset thing like I did! Just take a page from our Frozen gal-pals and Let it Go. You may be surprised what your hair will do when you leave it the hell alone for a while!

How about you? Do you have any tricks of the trade that you swear by? Fun race-day styles? Headbands that you adore? Let’s spread the hair love!

The State of the Union

I don’t know about you folks, but the holiday season of 2014 – 2015 has been pretty great to me so far!

First, Christmas came to town, and we had a blast. I mean, my mama-in-law got me a tiara. Like, a legit crown.

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“Put it on me, put it on me, put it on me, put it on me!”

Santa Claus was also really good to me this year, with an awesome new Under Armour hoodie in my favorite Kelly Green, a gorgeous little 13.1 silver necklace, and a brand spankin new Garmin!

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I’ll be the first to admit: I love my old Garmin 305. That thing has been steadfastly there for me on every run for more than 4 years now, and I’d venture a guess to say that it probably runs better than I do (imitate rimshot here). But the thing is like running with the Startship Enterprise Command Module on your wrist. It doesn’t feel like it, but it looks ridiculous, and makes easily glancing at my stats near impossible if I’m wearing sleeves – nevermind the fact that sleeves won’t even fit over the thing. This new 610 was a welcome addition to the family, and I broke it in with a nice run Christmas morning and haven’t looked back since!

Unfortunately hubby caught a nasty cold that day, so instead of the usual post-Christmas shopping bonanza, we spent the next 3-4 days laying low.

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I did make a friend on one of my runs though! He followed me for a whole block and I had to walk him back to his house.

After one day of work last week, I was laid up with the same funky sickness from the 30th-the 2nd, and while it SUCKED, I’m pleased to say that I slept for about 18 hours of every day to recover, and I loved it. After the first few days, the week was still a huge success! We rang in the new year with loved ones..

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…I found cool new workout tops on sale at Kohls for $5 each…

photo 5

… we had a perfectly quiet, talking about life, caffeine-filled, hot cocoa and people-watching night at Starbucks…

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he’s all mine 🙂

…we took my Dad into Red Bank for a day of Surf Taco, hobby shop wandering, and comic books…

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Catholicism WOW!

…and even though I had to skip 4 days due to illness, I managed to get right back on track for week 2 of my training plan with an Insanity workout (OUCH) and a totally-out-of-my-comfort-zone trail run with my friend Kevin yesterday!

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The smiles before the hills.

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Finally some action shots in nature!

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Overcast and 60 degrees – perfect running weather! 

I had a real blast on those trails. A year ago I’d be petrified to run on uneven terrain like that: the instability in my knee, the weakness in my quads, my lack of confidence in my running… let’s just say I would have passed on this invite. But as I finished my morning coffee and looked out at the misty weather, prepping for 4 miles on the treadmill to satisfy my training schedule requirements for the day, Kevin texted me with an invitation to go out and explore. And explore we did! For 4 whole miles and change, we ran through the hills and woods of Holmdel Park discussing life, love, and the need for two laundry baskets in a relationship. In a word, this run was perfection!

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And that brings us to today! I’m sore beyond words and exhausted – just like pretty much everyone else out there today who went back to work after however long they had off for the holidays – but I’m happy. At first I was super upset that I had gotten sick: there’s nothing worse than feeling like caca and having to stay home when you’ve got time off from work and want to be out celebrating and doing all the things.

But the cold or flu or whatever it was actually gave me just what I needed: down time. It forced me to relax and nap and recharge my battery, and I was able to recover with enough time to get some fun stuff done too. Instead of going at full tilt the entire 2 weeks, I was able to rest for most of it and as a result, I’m feeling relaxed, recharged, and ready to take on whatever’s coming my way in 2015!

How about you? I hope your new year is treating you well so far! Tell me all about it in the comments…

Funny Running

I love the internet. I mean, without it, I wouldn’t be talking to you right now.

But in addition to bringing total strangers together to talk about shared interests, the web has also made it so much easier to find funny shit to laugh uncontrollably at – especially funny shit about very specific shared interests, i.e., running.

Case in point: I’ve found a handful of funny running pictures that dissolve me into giggles every time I see them. I’m delighted to find a new post on Instagram or Facebook or wherever – but usually I’m giggling alone because my husband doesn’t find the humor in the word “fartlek” (wtf? it’s a funny word!!)

So I’ve decided to share with you some of my favorite running memes, in the hopes that I make you smile, even if you do so by yourself and your loved ones wonder what’s so damn funny. Enjoy!

11

#guilty

22

#evenmoreguilty

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I think that calls for an extra medal.

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so cheesy… until you get to the end!

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EVERY. SINGLE. RACE. PHOTO.

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True Story: This just happened this weekend.

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Amirite?

How about you – do you have any favorite running images or funny memes about our beloved pastime? If you do, please share the love!

It’s a Marshmallow World (and now I want cocoa)

Have you seen this Target commercial yet? The Christmas-themed one with the little girl running around a scary-ass, toy-filled Alice in Wonderland themed hellscape with a dog wearing booties?

Yeah, I don’t enjoy it either.

Now, it’s currently November 18th. And I estimate that I’ve seen this commercial about 3,945 times in the last two weeks. Because, you know, nothing says Christmas like November 9th.

I know I say this every year – and I see it every year in the news and hear about it from my friends and coworkers too, so I’m not alone – but are they airing these commercials earlier and earlier? I swear it used to be that you didn’t break out the jingle bells until December, Christmas decorations didn’t hit the stores until Black Friday, and we held off on fa-la-la-ing until like the week or two before the 25th.

At the risk of sounding like a scrooge (too late), I hereby rebel. Nay – I RAGE against the Christmas machine! I want to enjoy the holiday at its core: family, food, love, food, sharing, food, caring, wine… that’s what Christmas is all about, man. And frankly, if I start celebrating now, I won’t have any pants that fit come December 25th. So I’m calling a yuletide boycott until Friday, November 28th.

No list-making, no ho-ho-ho-ing (okay, maybe a little ho-ing, a girl’s gotta eat), no carol-singing, nada. Who’s coming with me??

Motivational Monday

Alright, kids. I don’t know about you. But here in New Jersey, it is a dark, dreary, stormy-clouds-hanging-around Monday, and I’m feeling some serious blah’s. I’ve been up since 3:30AM with a dehydration-induced migraine (seriously, I contemplated waking up the hubbs and going to the ER after an hour of pure white hot pain). And long story short, I’m basically trying to make it through today without a murder charge.

So to fight the doldrums, I’m going to shine some happy light around here in the hopes that by putting it out there I’ll get some back in return. Ready to smile?

To kick it off, here’s some happy positive graffiti that I spotted on my last 10-miler around our local park:

IMG_7916

Why thank you, pavement. You’re not to shabby yourself.

It’s not every day that the ground you walk on worships YOU, is it?

OK, maybe you’re not feeling beautiful, and that didn’t work. How about this box who *really* wants an apple?box appleSo… close…

Nothing? Maybe a happy zipper face will make you smile?
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I know it made me giggle.

No? Ok, maybe it’s time for a different approach. How about a nice chocolate peanut butter cake?

IMG_7747AKA the reason I will eat dinner tonight

Baked goods don’t do it for you? Maybe a nice motivational running quote will do it.

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I like this one.

My coworker actually surprised me with this in my inbox today – he’s an older gentleman who I don’t even usually talk about running with, but he sent me this with a note saying “This made me think of you.” And well, that just made my cold little grinchy heart grow three sizes. Maybe it’ll do the same for you?

How are you feeling now? Smiling a little more? Maybe you like little babies… how about a snapshot of me with my good friend’s new little girl, Brynn:

IMG_7511Oh, that noise they make when they eat, it just does something to me…

Or how about a baby holding an adult (if that’s your thing)?

images wWarning: JessRunsHappy.com is not responsible for any nightmares this photo causes.

OK, we’re going down a dark road here. I think I’m gonna wrap it up with one of my all time favorite funny photos. This one never fails to make me laugh, no matter how annoyed or down or tired I am. I hope you enjoy:

thug-life-chose-us-picThe longer you look, the funnier it gets.

How’d it work? I hope you’re at least a little happier now than you were when you first clicked here… I know I am! Spread the love to someone who you think could use a little pick-me-up today, and tell them Jess Runs Happy says hi 🙂

Look Out, Weird Al

Alright kids. Have a seat. It’s time we talk about an important topic: Running Mania.

Maybe you’ve been lucky and you haven’t experienced this phenomena. But for me, here’s how it goes down: at some point in every run when I’m almost on fumes, my legs go on autopilot and my mind wanders to the silliest, most ludicrous things it can conjure up. Sometimes I go for a jaunt to the Riviera Maya with Trent Reznor. Other times I create resumes for my dream jobs, like the time I wanted to be a roadie for Lit (a highlight from the qualifications section: “Knows how to tune a guitar; STD-free”).

In addition to exotic vacations and dream jobs, I’ve recently found that I have a knack for song parodies. Food-based song parodies, to be exact. And I find the most joy in using solely the songs of my travel partner Trent and his band, Nine Inch Nails.

You see, it all started last month when the following song came on my iPod at mile 3 of a tough 4 miler. The beat, Trent’s grunting, and knowing that there was a big-ass piece of yellow cake with fudge frosting waiting for me at home – well, it all combined for the perfect storm that sent a surge of adrenaline through my veins, and suddenly the chorus made perfect sense (fast forward to around :50 for the joke):

I AM THE “CAKE DESTROYER!!”

Clearly you can see where the rest of this post is headed.

After the chorus, it was just a matter of replacing some of the lyrics with cake-eating-related terms (“I hope they cannot see/the limitless potential/living inside of me/to eat up all the cake”) – and before I knew it, I had created my very first song parody.

A few nights later I discovered that this little ditty could be transformed into a cynical song about a fruity baked good, and I had another creation under my belt: “Blueberry Pie”.

Listen, I never said I was a GOOD song parody writer. But lyrics like “I feel my hunger grow all the more extreme/can you please pass me some vanilla ice cream?/blueberry pie!”… well, they practically write themselves. I’m just a conduit for the muses.

I’ll leave you with the last parody I came up with on a 10K one dark and lonely night. It’s a little bit of a stretch, but hear me out: a song about not wanting to go gluten-free, set to this jam:

“Bread in my hole!/warms up my soul!/I’d rather die!/Than give up my rolls!”

My name is Jess, and I’m a runner who comes up with horrible song parodies like “Bread in My Hole” ::hangs head in shame::

So how about you? Do you have anything that gets you through your long runs? Please tell me I’m not the only special little soul that suffers from Running Mania!

The Long Run, in GIFs

You can thank a few things for this post:

  1. My caffeine buzz from QuickChek’s new “Harvest Blend” coffee. I refuse to jump on the Pumpkin Spice bandwagon, and my favorite convenience store is right there with me. You can keep your Wawa’s, Starbucks, and Dunkin Donuts. I prefer the slightly alterna-chick vibe I get by being 100% staunchly pro-QuickChek.
  2. This ridiculously long but still incredibly entertaining list of gifs from Buzzfeed.

As I scrolled through the page before work, it occurred to me that many of these gifs represent my feelings before, during, and after a long run. Thusly, I present you with: The Long Run, in GIFs:

I wake up ready and raring to go.

angryOr not really, because I may have had a glass or two of wine the night before and set my alarm for WAY earlier than I really want to wake up on a Saturday, and who’s effing idea was it to sign up for a stupid marathon anyway?

So I stumble to the Keurig, pop in a Jamaican Me Crazy k-cup (thanks, Wolfgang Puck!), and begin the prep process. Fuel up, scrub my face, sunblock it all, and get decked out in my running gear finest then throw open the door to greet the morning with some attitude.

new gearStepping off the porch I remind myself that I should probably do some dynamic stretching; these knees don’t exactly have the get-up-and-go they used to, after all.

stretchBut instead I wait and wait, then take off the second my Garmin has satellite reception, like an idiot.

startOr a pirate.

The first mile or so is touch and go. My music is pumping, I’m feeling fresh as hell, ready to take on this run. But my legs, knees, hips and ankles sometimes have other plans.

fumbleSo I slow it down a bit and settle into a nice pace for a few miles. 2, 3, 4, 5+ miles go by, and it’s all good.

yeah baby

Around the halfway point though, I start to get a little distracted. Sure, I’m running, but maybe this song isn’t what I want to hear right now, let me slow down for a few strides here and find a new one. Oh look, sunflowers! That’d make a really great #seenonmyrun pic. I may even do a little run-dancing to break the monotony.

motorinBut then I catch a creeper at a red light just watching me with a weird look on his face, so I stop dancing and pick up the pace again for a few miles.

watching

Once I pass the halfway point I start to think a little too much about things. Am I going fast enough? Can I maintain the pace that I just kept for an hour+ for another hour+? GOD my legs are starting to get heavy. Or are they? Is it all in my mind? They say running is all mental, so am I psyching myself out now, or am I really tired? Oh hey another red light.

snailThank God. Let me just walk through that.

I glance at my watch and think “OK, 3 more miles. We can do that. That’s just a 5k! You can do that in your sleep. For breakfast. Mmmm breakfast. What kind of food should I eat when I finish this run? Pancakes maybe. Yes. Remember that time you went to IHOP with Jenny for unlimited pancakes and you tapped out after 3? Hahaha what a lightweight. Ugh weight. You know if you weighed less you’d probably be able to run faster. You really are so slow. I mean come on. Maybe you shouldn’t have signed up for this marathon. After all, this is only a portion of what you have to run, and you’re already flagging? You’re kind of pathetic. Just quit. Or don’t, because everyone that you told about this marathon would laugh at you and call you a failure. Maybe you need a new song to motivate you. Not that one. Another one. Another one. Oh my God, WHY DO YOU HAVE A SONG FROM THE LION KING SOUNDTRACK ON YOUR RUNNING PLAYLIST??”

insaneIt is hell inside my mind in those final miles.

Before I know it, all of my mental anguish has brought me to the final mile and my legs are ready to give up. I might have hit the wall by now, or I’m close to it. So I dig deep in my energy reserves and call upon my good friends Robyn, Britney, or Freddie for some moral support and head into the final kick.

final kick

In the last 5 minutes or so of a run, I will make all manner of uncomfortable faces, say some pretty nasty motivational things to myself, run-dance, jump, air-drum, and basically do everything I need to push through the last .5 mile and call it a day. With every step, I glance at my watch, anxiously awaiting the appearance of the magic numbers after my mileage – ##:00.

And just like that, it’s over!

PR danceI stop the watch, do a little fist pump, and maybe bend over for a bit to catch my breath because let’s face it, Brit-Brit knows how to make me work, b*tch. Time to celebrate the fact that I got through it!

ice bathWith a nice cold bath.

After some stretching, rehydrating, and an ice bath (or shower), it’s food time. Sometimes I feel like eating all of the things after a run, and other times I can’t stand the sight of food, but one thing is for certain: after I eat, it is always, indefinitely, without fail:

naptimeNap time.

FIN.

Search Term Hilarity

I know what you’re thinking.

“2 posts in one day? Surely she must be mad!”

Well make of it what you will but I had to post now that I’ve taken a look at some of the wacky search terms that have brought people to my blog. I truly appreciate every visitor and love that you guys take the time to read my random ramblings, but I do kind of worry about you when you’re searching for terms like these and find me.

Here’s a sampling of the weirdest search terms that brought people to JessRunsHappy.com since its inception earlier this year (and my thoughts on each one):

  • great stirrup cay sinus infection
    • I’m sorry but I think you need to see a doctor, not my piddly little running blog.
  • i just wanna medal dis yr
    • me too, friend. me too.
  • celebrate jim carrey
    • yes, let’s! let’s ALL celebrate Jim Carrey!
  • swimming caps embarrassment
    • this one actually makes me smile. I’m so glad I’m not the only one!
  • coxsackie happy birthday
    • these two things do NOT belong together, and I pity this poor person if that’s what they got for their birthday.

I don’t know what’s more troublesome: the fact that folks are typing these searches into Google, or the fact that my writing is connected with these terms.

How about you – how did you find JessRunsHappy.com? Or if you’re also a blogger, what are some of the weirdest searches that have brought new visitors to your blogs? I need to know!